Genetics...A Guessing Game

After analyzing several more pints of Ben's blood and little bit of mine, there are still no conclusive results to what genetic disorder Ben may have. Both Ben and I have an odd addition to our X chromosome, but since I also have it and show no delays and disabilities, then it may not be the cause of Ben's own delays and disabilities. However, Ben's neurologist, not geneticist, shared that sometimes a combination of chromosomal issues and other genetic abnormalities can be the cause of a disorder.

During the summer, the geneticist ran a series of the newest genetic tests, ones recently developed in the past 5-6 years. I have not heard anything and assume there were no findings. I did get a $4700 bill that they assured me the practice would cover.

I still stand by my diagnosis - Ben has his own special disorder, unique to him, one they will not find through tests or charts. And the disorder is characterized by sweetness, stubbornness and the ability to stump doctors and occasionally steal pens and personal items out of pockets.

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Parenting an Adult Child with Disabilities

"Parenting an Adult Child with Disabilities" is a series on eSpeciallyBen. As Ben approached 18, it was clear our role changed as parents. We needed to help Ben transition into adulthood. These stories are meant to assist other families who face, or will face, some of the same challenges. Talking About the Future Guest Post - Matt Wilson Legal Guardianship, Medicaid and SSI Researching Group Homes Questions to Ask at a Group Home Visit Referral Packet for Group Homes Getting Assistance from a Care Manager From Group Home Placement to Discharge Reaching for Independence How I Make Being a Mom and Volunteer Work at this Group Home

Parenting an Adult Child with Disabilities: From Group Home Placement to Discharge

Last August, we moved Ben into an alternative family living (AFL) placement, about 90 minutes from our home in Charlotte. It was a three-bedroom house and Ben was given the largest bedroom with its own bathroom. A typical AFL in North Carolina operates like this: a person with disabilities, the client, moves in with another family, couple or an individual. The client lives in the family’s home and the family receives payment in return for housing, feeding and caring for the client. Ben’s AFL was unusual: A couple with extensive caregiving experience wanted to run a three-bed group home but needed to apply for the license through the state. They were willing to take Ben as the first resident in a house, separate from the one they lived in. The plan, according to the couple, was to get approval for the group home within a couple of months. We ordered Ben a double bed, headboard, 54-inch television, new sheets, towels and blankets. Friends helped us move him in....

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In September, Ben celebrated three years living in a group home in Charlotte, North Carolina, with five other men. Ben lives 20 minutes from our house, and we see him several times a week for doctor's appointments, to drop off supplies, for group home events and sometimes because I just miss him. Ben occassionally sleeps over, and he often spends a weekend day hanging out on his favorite couch, watching videos at our house. This Easterseals PORT Health home is Ben's second placement. The first placement through another agency didn't work out, and he left after six months . We were wary of trying a new place, but it's worked out well. My husband, Ryan, and I have developed a partnership with ESPH. Over time, we've built mutual respect and trust with the residents and staff. Here's what's worked for us: 1. Get involved with the group home. Ben lives with five other men in a six-bedroom house in Charlotte. On move-in day, Steven, one of the residents, made ...

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