eSpecially Ben

A Walking Machine - that's exactly what Ben has become over the summer.

We've had a bit of a bumpy start, education-wise, but things are good now.  Actually my son was just honored at his mainstream school assembly as the 'Star of the Week' for his class, as he knew all his letters and letter sounds.  This is something I was not expecting.  Of course I know my son is super clever, but 2 weeks into the school year I anticipated tantrums and being called to come and bring him home, not awards!  But I feel this is proof that he is in the right place.  His needs are being met and he is content.  That's all I have been praying for and that's what we've got! Let me take you back.  You see, because my son has trouble with new people, places, routines, and the like I carefully planned our cross country house move 18 months before he was to start school.  My intention was to settle him in our new house, and a new pre-school with children who would be attending the local (very sweet, just 80 students total) school to prepare him for the smo

School has been nothing but a bad experience for us.  You have teachers that have no idea how to work with a child with autism, (although it's supposed to be an autism class).  Most aides that are in the class don't have much of a clue either and most have very minimal training in how to address the behaviors and teach.  We've experienced school for Tye in 3 different states, FL, NY and NC.  It's been awful in all those states.  In NY, they did offer more services, which I had to fight to get with a Special Ed lawyer's help.  He did get really good after school services, like ABA and a behavioral consultant plus additional ST and OT.  Other children in the same school district didn't receive the same level of services because school districts don't give anything without a fight.  The public school system in NY was very poor.  If there were openings in the private school setting the district would have sent him there, but of course there were no openings.

This month the writers for the eSpecially Parents series will focus on their child’s experience with schools and the educational system. I have written a lot about Ben’s experiences at school. For the most part we have been very happy with his teachers, staff and academics. In preparing to write this post, I thought about why we have had good experiences and what went wrong when we did not. Here are three areas that I think help to summarize why we continue to  be happy with the public school system. Expertise - I know that I am an expert on Ben because I have known him the longest and involved with every detail of his life, but I also value that the people working with Ben are most likely experts about how to best teach him. They are trained in educating children with needs such as Ben and have special techniques that work.  I begin with the assumption that they went into this field because they have a love for this particular profession and the work that they do. Rela

Remember those words, "Left Back" when you were in school. To me it meant a kid did not do well in school and had to redo the grade again. The negative connotation of that phrase is still strong in me. We made the decision to "retain", the politically correct word for being left back, Ben for the upcoming school year. He is repeating 2nd grade. Ben will be able to attend school until he is 21 years old. It was recommended to us that Ben should repeat a grade three times - once in elementary, middle and then high school, spreading out the years. At first I was upset by it. Now that Ben is in class and doing well, I have not given it another thought. It is best for him and that is what is most important. Anyone have thoughts about retaining a child during his or her time in school?

Ben ran down the pier in his walker, until he hit this feirce wind. A few seconds of it and he turned right around!

Two years and lots learned. Here's a shot at just a few of those lessons: Perspective - Each time I record a piece of our family's history here, I am able to see the growth, changes and patterns that are a part of our life. Today, when I write about Ben's amazing progress with walking, I can compare it to a year ago when our biggest concern was seizures and finding the right medicine to control them. Ben's walking had taken a "step backward" and I had not even realized it until he started walking so well in May after a change in medication. A year ago, I was distraught over Ben's school closing, and now he may be at a place that will provide him with as much, if not more, opportunities for growth and independence than his old school. Introspective - Keeping up with posts for a blog is time consuming. To be consistent with current topics and regular posts is difficult. Finding the right topic to write about, ones that will interest readers, i