Once Bitten, Twice Shy

For two years, we have steered clear of jolly Old St. Nick. After the incident at the Shriner's Christmas Party in 2012, we did not want to risk our standing with the big guy at the North Pole. It seems, however, that Santa has let bygones be bygones.

We visited Daniel Stowe Botanical Gardens and Santa was there visiting. I knew Sean, our six year old would agree to a visit, that Logan would say no, but was completely surprised when Ben went nuts with excitement when he saw Santa. With trepidation, we approached Santa with Ben.

Ben savored every moment with this gentle and kind Santa. It was not crowded, and there was no pressure to rush the experience. When we were not sure if Ben was going to cuddle with Santa or pull off his hat, we said our goodbyes. (Well, not until I sat on Santa's lap and took a photo. How many other chances will I have to do that?)

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Parenting an Adult Child with Disabilities

"Parenting an Adult Child with Disabilities" is a series on eSpeciallyBen. As Ben approached 18, it was clear our role changed as parents. We needed to help Ben transition into adulthood. These stories are meant to assist other families who face, or will face, some of the same challenges. Talking About the Future Guest Post - Matt Wilson Legal Guardianship, Medicaid and SSI Researching Group Homes Questions to Ask at a Group Home Visit Referral Packet for Group Homes Getting Assistance from a Care Manager From Group Home Placement to Discharge Reaching for Independence

Parenting an Adult Child with Disabilities: From Group Home Placement to Discharge

Last August, we moved Ben into an alternative family living (AFL) placement, about 90 minutes from our home in Charlotte. It was a three-bedroom house and Ben was given the largest bedroom with its own bathroom. A typical AFL in North Carolina operates like this: a person with disabilities, the client, moves in with another family, couple or an individual. The client lives in the family’s home and the family receives payment in return for housing, feeding and caring for the client. Ben’s AFL was unusual: A couple with extensive caregiving experience wanted to run a three-bed group home but needed to apply for the license through the state. They were willing to take Ben as the first resident in a house, separate from the one they lived in. The plan, according to the couple, was to get approval for the group home within a couple of months. We ordered Ben a double bed, headboard, 54-inch television, new sheets, towels and blankets. Friends helped us move him in....

Ben is thriving in his group home in Charlotte. I wrote about what he's been up to in this story in Southpark Magazine: Givers: All together Happy Holidays! Photo Credit Grant Baldwin Photography

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