Skip to main content

Let's Do Lunch, Please!

I know my worth as a mother is closely tied to making lunch for school for my children. Ben is on a set schedule - Monday and Thursday he buys lunch in the cafeteria, all other days, he packs a lunch. We have a good system - Ben gets some variety, I get a break two days a week, but get my mothering needs met.

My middle son, Logan, started full day school this year. At first he was adamant that he would not buy lunch - the whole process is intimidating and the food is a bit questionable. Since August, I have packed his lunch. And happy to do so.

Two weeks ago, Logan came home and announced that he wanted to buy lunch. It was more fun and gave him more play time (still not sure what he meant by that - but in the mind of a four-year old, it made sense). So for the past two weeks, he's bought his lunch. I bit my tongue trying not to persuade him. In my head, I kept repeating that age old saying about, "If you love something, set it free. If it comes back to you, it is yours. If it doesn't, it never was."

Finally yesterday, as I always do, I casually asked about lunch - well casually for me. Logan said it was fine, but he did not get dessert because he did not like the jello they had. Without getting too excited to hear that all was not well in the lunch-line, I asked if he wanted to bring his lunch tomorrow. Logan responded with, "I was thinking that too, Mom."

Woohoo!!! I cheered quietly inside - He came back! He came back!


I will lay off the cottage cheese for now, that was the last lunch I packed when he deserted me. Now I know why my Mom packed Suzy-Q's, Twinkies and Devil Dogs for my dessert for 13 years - who'd leave that?

Comments

Popular posts from this blog

How I Make Being a Mom and Volunteer Work at this Group Home

  In September, Ben celebrated three years living in a group home in Charlotte, North Carolina, with five other men. Ben lives 20 minutes from our house, and we see him several times a week for doctor's appointments, to drop off supplies, for group home events and sometimes because I just miss him. Ben occassionally sleeps over, and he often spends a weekend day hanging out on his favorite couch, watching videos at our house. This Easterseals PORT Health home is Ben's second placement. The first placement through another agency didn't work out, and he left after six months . We were wary of trying a new place, but it's worked out well. My husband, Ryan, and I have developed a partnership with ESPH. Over time, we've built mutual respect and trust with the residents and staff.  Here's what's worked for us: 1. Get involved with the group home. Ben lives with five other men in a six-bedroom house in Charlotte. On move-in day, Steven, one of the residents, made ...

Gadgets & Gizmos - Part 6: Landeez Chair

We spent last week at the beach near Atlantic Beach in North Carolina. At Fort Macon Park , they have a special chair for people like Ben who may need extra help moving in the sand and water. The chair is made by Landeez . We were amazed by this chair. It did travel over the sand and in small amounts of water with ease. We bought an inexpensive strap to go around Ben's waist so he would not fall out.  I thought that Ben could go farther in the water sitting in the chair, but it does eventually float...away if in too deep of water. Ben got tired of sitting in it and wiggled his way under the strap. For the most part, it is a great invention and it made it easier for us to keep Ben safe on the beach. If he had been interested in a long walk on the beach, this would have worked great for him.

Parenting an Adult Child with Disabilities: From Group Home Placement to Discharge

  Last August, we moved Ben into an alternative family living (AFL) placement, about 90 minutes from our home in Charlotte. It was a three-bedroom house and Ben was given the largest bedroom with its own bathroom.  A typical AFL in North Carolina operates like this: a person with disabilities, the client, moves in with another family, couple or an individual. The client lives in the family’s home and the family receives payment in return for housing, feeding and caring for the client.  Ben’s AFL was unusual: A couple with extensive caregiving experience wanted to run a three-bed group home but needed to apply for the license through the state. They were willing to take Ben as the first resident in a house, separate from the one they lived in. The plan, according to the couple, was to get approval for the group home within a couple of months.  We ordered Ben a double bed, headboard, 54-inch television, new sheets, towels and blankets. Friends helped us move him in....